Do I really have to earn the English countryside?

This is Ightham Mote (shown via a picture I stole from the National Trust) in Kent. It'scuriously-named. The "Mote" refers to the house, not the  700 year-old manor house, possibly named after it's status as a meeting point in Anglo Saxon times)

I went there with my grandparents and sister during Semana Santa (which, when you've crossed the Channel, becomes the plain old Easter Holidays). This is the kind of place I'm always going to associate with my grandparents. It's one of my granddad's favourite places. There's a delicateness in that.  And yes, I finally got my cream tea.

If teaching makes me go completely beserk, I don't think that working for the National Trust would be a bad choice. Doddering around, telling people information that NOBODY asked for... seems like a good life.

Other than that it was a fairly quiet break. Three social plans fell through because of travel issues, but still, I needed the rest.

I missed the green, and having the countryside on my doorstep. Having two supermarkets on my doorstep isn't the same at all. Albacete smells like Manchego cheese, and I'm not joking. There's that fresh-rain smell in Kent, that "got up early and going on holiday feeling" that you don't really get in the city.

Perhaps coming back to Albacete the day before lessons started wasn't the best idea I'd ever had. My flight was at 5.30 on Monday morning. I had to squeeze sleep in whenever I could - on the plane, and even at the train station, huddled over my suitcase like it was a nest, for three hours whilst I waited for a train

I went to a cafe and DIDN'T EVEN WANT CAKE WITH MY CHAI LATTE WHAT IS HAPPENING?!

I don't hate my job, or even dislike it. I'm doing what I want to do, and I want to be a teacher. I work for two really supportive companies and have received good feedback.

The trouble is, I'm scared to death. Still. I was actually more nervous about starting again after Semana Santa than I was about my first ever lesson. And what do you do if your job and source of income terrify you? I don't want to be popping Lexatin every five minutes to feel that I can go to work.

During Semana Santa I decided  some mighty changes -

1. Diet - I'm on a diet now. It's rich in magnesium.

2. Sleep

3. Exercise

Perhaps yoga, listening to Kate Bush and hollering like a goat. "HELLO EARTH!!!"

4. Planning and organisation - A strange blend of doing less, but actually doing more.

And how much of this came to pass? Not an awful lot. The

Oh yes, last night I went to a Tasca..